A Healthy Fear of Sin Versus Living in Fear of Sinful Failure

I was recently posed a counseling-related scenario that forced me to think. This is good. If I’m putting the scenario into question form, it sounds something like this: “I have hurt my family through my selfish actions in the past, but I am growing now in godliness. And I have a healthy fear of that particular sinful habit (because I don’t want to hurt my family again). But the freedom I’ve experienced lately almost feels too good to be true. I’m waiting for the ‘other shoe to drop.’ I’m afraid I will commit that sin again. What do I do with that fear?”

First of all, the above scenario highlights something good. This person does not want to harm themselves, their relationship with God, or their family. Anytime there is something or someone we love and value, the thought of losing or damaging that relationship or object evokes fear. Fear is not always bad. There is such a thing as healthy fear that corresponds with love. I love my child, so I respond in fear when I see them step out into the street as a car approaches. I love my wife, so I respond with a sense of anxiety when a medical diagnosis gets flagged. The fear actually drives me to healthy actions. Just a few biblical examples below demonstrate this:

• Joseph ran from Potiphar’s wife when she attempted to seduce him (Gen. 39). He did so because he loved God and respected his earthly master.
• “A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions [i.e., runs]. The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences.” – Prov. 22:3
• On the night of his arrest, Jesus himself responded to the prospect of separation from his heavenly Father with anxiety so extreme that he sweated drops of blood in the Garden of Gethsemane. He loved his Father so much that to be cut apart from him was nothing short of devastating. – Luke 22:41-44

This kind of fear is good and healthy. It occurs in proportion to the value I give someone or something. This kind of fear serves as motivational fuel to run from what is sin and cling to what is good.

That said, how does a person retain this kind of healthy fear while not being crippled by another kind of fear – the kind of fear that paralyzes, robs me of joy, and keeps me looking around every corner due to fear that I will sin again?

Ironically, this kind of fear is self-centered. Notice I did not say selfish. I just mean that the person is focused on themselves in regards to the prospect of potentially falling into sin. They are dangerously self-conscious. Consider the individual who has to give a speech or a presentation to a work or school audience (or something similar). This person frets and worries about their appearance, how they sound, the pace at which they speak, etc. At one level, a little bit of this sort of introspection is healthy. But it can also be deadly, leading the individual to be wrapped up in themselves in the moment at which they most need to not be thinking about themselves. We intuitively know this is not selfishness/greed. But it does take their focus off of where it needs to be and makes the experience less personally enjoyable to him or her.

In a similar vein, once repentance has occurred for sin, to be preoccupied with avoiding sin actually takes a person’s eyes off of Jesus. Living purposefully for Jesus actually serves as the most effective barrier to falling into sin again. It would likely not take long to think of analogies for this. A person who chooses to get married because they actively love their fiancé is in better position than a person who only gets married because they do not want to be single. The individual who tries to healthily change their diet because they want to be more able to play and be physically fit for their kids is in a better position for joyful, sustained change than the individual who alters their diet out of peer pressure from friends or neighbors. This isn’t to say that fear-based motivations are always bad, but it is to say that they are not the best and most freedom-giving motivations.

Here are some passages of Scripture I believe speak to this reality, both directly and indirectly:

• “Taste and see that the LORD is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!” (Psalm 34:8) The emphasis is on experiencing the goodness of God, not avoiding sin (in pursuing the former, the latter’s grip is weakened).
• “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable.” (Philippians 4:8) Paul seems to be chiefly connecting all of these qualities (true, honorable, right, pure, love, admirable) to godly realities — things like salvation, adoption, the gift of the Holy Spirit in our hearts, God being a present help in trouble, etc. Again, we are fixing our minds on what is true, good, and beautiful about God, more than fixating on avoiding sin.
• “I—yes, I alone—will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.” (Isaiah 43:25) Through the prophet Isaiah, God tells his people of the forgiveness he offers for sin. He “will never think of them again” doesn’t mean God has cognitively forgotten about them, but it does mean he no longer holds them against us. It is his joy to blot them out. He is not waiting for us to mess up. Biblical counselor Ed Welch states, “He doesn’t forgive us because of our resolve to [not sin] again. He forgives us because of his resolve to forgive those who come to him.”
• “[I]f we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness….My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous.” (1 John 1:9-2:1) John tells us that God’s kindness to make a way to free us from sin is actually itself meant to serve as a motivator to not sin. But even when (not if) we do sin, this does not catch God by surprise. He is gladly willing and able to forgive us then as well.

So yes, we want to run from sin. We want to have a healthy fear of sin’s consequences. Sin is destructive, it ruins, it perverts, it leads to sadness in the end. But we are not meant to combat sin primarily by fearing sin. We combat sin primarily by keeping our eyes on Jesus. His perfect love is intended to reorient the things that motivate us and to chase out fear. Though functioning as two sides of the same coin, we are primarily running to God, not away from sin.